The Birthers Hawaii Obama Conspiracy

Hawaii is not a state in the union of the United States of America. I am sure one of you birthers holds the true secret and special information to prove this.

You say Obama has no birth certificate. Please see the picture at the top of the page. Do you have one?

The birth certificate is a forgery except that Obama's birth certificate was validated by the Hawaii Department of Health.

Hawaii's two major newspapers, the Honolulu Advertiser and the Star Bulletin both report birth announcements of August 4, 1961 for Bark Obama. Maybe Obama can time travel?

Obama was smuggled into America by Islamic terrorists. Their master plan is to have a Muslim president who will destroy America from within. Gag me with a spoon.

WTF, do you think that Obama's parents smuggled him into Hawaii, faked a non existent birth certificate and got his birth announcement published because they knew that he would need this when he becomes president? Don't you think that is this was true that Clinton or McCain would have used this information?

The inconvenient truth is: Your kind lost the election!!!!

The world has to and is moving on without you while you lay their with your head stuck in pond muck.

No matter how much factual information Birthers are presented with, they have a mental illness, just as other conspiracy theorist have. All your strange beliefs spur people away from the Republican party, helping to destroying it in the process.

Thank you one and all for proving Darwin wrong. Not everyone has the ability to evolves.

Steve

Man Catches Fire After Being Tasered

The story doesn't match what the storyline promises, simply that, a man catches on fire because he is tased. The story line sounds impressive but as in many news report, the facts or the story lines are embellished.

"Western Australia police said they were responding to a complaint at a house when Mitchell ran outside carrying a cigarette lighter and a large plastic bottle containing what they believe was fuel. When he refused to stop running toward them, one officer Tasered him, police said in a statement.

The man was immediately engulfed in flames. The officer threw him to the ground and smothered the blaze with his hands, the statement said. Mitchell was charged with assault to prevent arrest and possession of a sniffing substance." KRISTEN GELINEAU, AP

Fire is a triangle. You need Fuel + Oxygen+ Heat. So a man covered in gasoline (Fuel) in a oxygen atmosphere (Oxygen) gets tased (Heat) what do you expect besides a roasted marshmallow? I see embellishment in the news all the time. News report: "Cars were totally submerged on the road" as the background pictures show cars driving through the water up to the hub caps. One loan car that had been driven into a ditch had water to the hood. Either the story was embellished or the news editor does not know that submerged means totally underwater?

WTF? Are we being constantly lied too or are reporters that stupid?

"Don't taze me bro!"

Steve

Wiener Crashes Wienermobile

A House Takes it in the Rear from a Giant Wiener.

A young lady, trying to turn her wiener around in a driveway, thought she was moving in reverse. But she instead went forward, inserting her wiener into the home.

That is not the way they really make new homes, is it?

Wienermobiles are driven by "hotdoggers". They attend Hot Dog High in Madison, Wisconsin. There they learn about the company's products and history as well as receive specialized drivers training.

OK, your perched 8 feet above the pavement. You have a huge, bus sized windscreen in front of you. and yet you manage to stuff your wiener because you think you are backing up when you are actually moving forward? WTF?

I know there are smoked wieners but I didn't know that you could smoke a wiener!

Steve

Elvis Presley's Lost 1958 Cadillac Found

From NBC-2.COM

An unexpected discovery inside a 1958 Cadillac is creating quite a buzz at a Charlotte County car shop.

A worker noticed a gold-plated cigarette lighter and ashtray mounted on the back seat. The piece has the words "Elvis Presley" engraved on it.

And now for the WTF? moment:

Shop staff says the current car owner didn't even know it was there.

Now they're trying to trace these wheels back to the king of rock and roll. "We found a web site that there was rumor he owned a '58 Cadillac which this isn't the real color, the title of the car show it's supposed to be black," said Charles Allison of Nick's Custom Cars.

How cool is this? I wonder what they found under the back seat?

Steve

Florida Python Hunting Permit

My python boot is too tight
I couldn't get it off last night

Florida Governor Charlie Crist, Senator Bill Nelson and other officials propose putting a bounty on pythons. South Florida hunters and hunting clubs from tramping out to state wildlife preserves to whip up enthusiasm for python extermination and then posting trophy photos of themselves with 10- to 15-ft. snakes on the Internet.

A week went by
And now it's July

There are an estimated 150,000 Pythons roaming the everglades national park and any effective bounty program would require lifting the ban on hunting in the federally managed Everglades, something U.S. officials are considering doing.

I finally got it off
And my girlfriend cried, YOU GOT STINK-FOOT!

It won't be long before Governor Christ wises up and issues permits on other exotic species that are overrunning Florida and it fauna. Pythons, Vervet monkeys, Nile monitor lizards and the all so taste Iguana and wild Hogs. I see a nice income from exotic game permit's. WTF Charlie!, it's another form of tourist driven cash flow for a cash strapped state and helps to solve the exotic animal problem.

Stink-foot, darlin' by Frank Zappa

Steve

Death by Cell Phone

Driver inattention is a leading cause of traffic crashes, responsible for about 80 percent of all collisions, according to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA). Considering crashes are the number-one cause of accidental death in the U.S., it is important to pay close attention to our driving habits and those of other drivers. This from the NSC.org website.

I constantly see and am affected by these idiots as they yabber away or texting while driving, something in itself that does not seem to be their forte.

These people put us, themselves and their passengers, often their own children, at risk of injury or death.

You can hit someone with a hammer till they are brain dead and you will go to prison. Cause the same injury while distracted by your cell phone and it may, just may, cost you an extra $500 in fines.

WTF is it with these double standards in this country?

Steve

I Have the Mango Crusty Lips Blues

I love mangos.

WTF you say"? You never ate a fresh mango?

Eaten as fresh fruit, mango ice cream, mango soda, mango crunch, mango tarts, mango shakes and even mango Icees from 7-11. From the first turpentine mango I ate in Liberia to the wonderful mango's found on Pine Island Florida to the rare tree in the back yard that stated as a seed in the compost pile and rivals the best mangos I have ever had from a grafted variety.

Now I have the mango Crusties. Little bumps at the corner of my mouth. A rash that burns, worse with salt. Dry, scaly herpes like lips. Hurts to smile.

Just a touch of mango skin to my lips brings on the crusty's. I am lucky that after a two weeks of slobbering through mango's, all i get is crust in the corners of my mouth.

I am allergic to latex, poison ivy, so bad that I contacted it in January in Michigan and poison sumac of which mangos are in the same family.

I will never stop eating mangos and I will probably never learn not to eat them in moderation.

I am going to go eat some mango ice cream to sooth my lips.

Steve